Family comm

on mom's condo stuff 11/26/17

Hi mom, Megan, Colleen, Brian, Kelly, David, Shaun, Sean, Eric, Adam and Clay,

It looks to Colleen and I that it will probably be 90 days or more before mom can move into this condo. 90 days might be the average time from the purchase and sale (contract) and the closing. And that purchase and sale is nowhere in sight. I tried to check out the listing and went to zillow and redfin and looked at the map and there was no listing at the spot on the map where the development is. No one was in the office on our Friday 10/24 visit though the sign indicated it should be open. I forget the name of the place.

There were a few things that jumped out at me from the visit to the condo. The condo association might want to arrange for a fund given by the builder to deal with some of these items as they become problems in the future

The first was the lack of thermal break between the foundation and the slab. From looking near the sliding glass door you can see what looks to be a 10" concrete foundation wall with the slab poured right up to it. A quality construction detail would have rigid insulation to prevent the cold from conducting into the slab. That insulation could be on the outside or the inside of the foundation wall. It is in neither place. In the cold of the winter when it is like 20 degrees out, that cold will pass right through that foundation and make the floor feel cold, no matter how high you set the thermostat. Poor detailing there makes me think maybe there are other shortcuts, perhaps there is no insulation under the slab either. This problem will affect all the units on the first floor but for an end units it will be worse since they have so much more exterior wall.

There has been a lot of talk about post Sandy building practices and it has been pointed out the the units sit at 9' above high tide. Yet that does not alone guarantee that there won't be water problems for these buildings. Even if you build on top of a hill, if the grade does not slope away from the building or if the level of the soil is too close to the top of the foundation you can get damp floors, mildew under the floor, cracked slabs or other problems. The building code typically calls the landscaping to be at least 8" below the top of the foundation. Much of the exterior wall has dirt/muclh within 4 or 5 inches. The landscaping should slope away from the house at a minimum of 6 inches in ten feet. For much of the exterior that is not so. During our Friday visit I noticed the ground toward the rear of the sideyard was pretty spongy and flat. The base of the plantings around the back patio were higher than the level of the patio. In a big rain or snow storm water could very well find it way onto the patio and from there under the sliding glass door and then under the carpet. Even though there is a storm drain about 25' away, it will do nothing to alleviate the problems of poor construction detailing within the first 10' of the building.

I have some questions about some of the building exterior detailing. Under the bay window there is stone exterior facing, the rest is typical vinyl siding. It looks like there is some kind of metal flashing under the exterior finish in the area around the bay. There is a joint between the bottom of the window and the top of the stone facing. The stone facing projects about 2-3 inches beyond the window. Water or snow sitting on top of that stone facing might very well be able to wick back behind it.

Though I spent many years as a builder, general contractor and carpenter, I probably am not the best person to address these issues; perhaps an independent licenced building inspector or engineer would be the better. I would be willing to help in any way I can. I would be happy to talk to the builder or research local building codes. It would be good to have access to the building plans and condo docs.

Peri 2/6/17

Happy Birthday my sweetheart. You are my hero. You are strong and smart and loving. You say 65 feels different and you've been letting your world know. It makes sense. You have worked hard, helping and caring for many people over lots of years. You are a model of a fighter, fierce and loyal, wise and loving, talented and dedicated. On to relaxing more and renewing your focus on the things you love. You have given so much, the world will go on without needing quite so much of you. Me, I can't get enough of you. Lucky me.

on feb17 trip

[ Friday, October 14, 2016 9:32 PM ] Tim: I like the St Augustinillo. Most flights go through MEX, add 6+hours to the trip and cost $350 more. [ Friday, October 14, 2016 9:39 PM ] Tim: I would prefer to spend a couple of days in df on either end of an aeromexico $450 flight. It looks like we could fly togetr from MEX to HUX for $115RT

post trump thanksgiving

We thank our politicians for playing on our fears and delivering us the pablum of false hope. But most of all we prostrate our selves to you our god, all predator neoliberalconservatives who are all good and deserving of all our love. We firmly resolve with the help of thy grace to detest those different, to do for our own and forever battle each other instead of you, our gods. In the name of the corporate oligarchy, wall street and the holy dollar, amen.

to peri in df

So maybe on a night you just can't sleep you can read my ramblings...

Tuesday 11/8/16

Thinking about what to do, I found a hackathon I though I might join - Sat 11/12 all day to create a better city using arduino. (Remember that one about City of Boston bus routes - you were pissed at the amount of time I spent on it) Figured I'd go downtown for the preliminary meeting this afternoon and lo an behold I found my messenger computer bag in the back hall on a hanger with Noah's suit coats after not seeing it for a year. It was a good omen so I went.

The room was crowded (bad sign) nobody had a computer(bad sign). turns out it was a bunch of French kids from university of Lyon pitching their ideas on how to save the world. They were here to soak up the Boston/US startup culture and maybe work with software developers. I listened to a couple of hare-brained unoriginal ideas from these kids and then talked to one of the people who looked old enough to drive. He answered my immediate concerns not too satisfactorily and told me the kids were actually business school students. Then there was a break.

I went back out into the beautiful day on the harbor and thought I could stay .. or I could go to Zaigamites for dollar oysters.

The oysters were from the James River in Virginia and they were sweet and delicious and so was the beer something like Duck Island Pilsner from Maine. I was still a hungry so I asked for the menu - $20 burgers and $18 potstickers - so inspired, I came home walked Uli and steamed up some $2 potstickers.

Ran into Matt and __ and Noli on the road. Noli ended up attacking Tim and Penny, I knew it was going to happen but Matt and ___ had little anticipation of the the situation.

Stopped in to see Noah and Karen on that job on Biltmore. At least the damn rocks were out of the truck an roughly placed in the yard. They are still huge and making them level is a bitch, but the scary, hard part is finally over. Noah was a little touchy though so I left them to it.

After star trek the screen went back to photos and there was a picture of you sitting at a table at the Lobster place in Maine this summer. You looked so happy and beautiful. It was before we realized a storm was bearing down on us. I stared at the photo until it changed.

I am in delay mode not wanting to watch the election returns yet. Started watching a star trek like series called Dark Matter on netflix.

10p Oh shit Trump is winning.

Wednesday

I have a trump hangover. tired watching Democracy Now but that just made it worse. I think I'll go on radio silence for a few years. Hendrix came over to borrow the car and we talked how we were both trying to spin it with the '2 parties 1 con' line of reasoning but with mixed success. 'A fierce thirst for change' they are saying. The demand for 'change' or 'progress' or 'back to the old days' seems implanted in us somehow and is such a convenient lever to be used by the rich to mainipulate us at will.

My mom returned my call of last week. 'Stocks are doing fine today' she says 'just down about 40 points'. She admits to helping put him in office and can't wait till Colony and those democrats around her take down their signs. She suggested Shaun and Kathy were happy with the results.

She is planning to pack up and come down a couple of days before Thanksgiving, stay at Shauns for a couple of weeks, then with Coll for a week or so then on to Kelly's for Christmas and then to NC.

I was in the middle of making hot sauce and ended up having to pee while on the call and now have a burning sensation at my penis. The hot sauce is pretty good (I added some frozen pears), but it is pretty hot. Had 5 tall jelly jars worth so I did a half assed job of boiling water bath on them.

Leo wants to talk rent so he'll be over soon. I'm thinking on the one hand market rent was ~$1800 when he moved in and probably still is now but on the other hand we want him to stay. I'd be happy settling up $200 at $1550. I'll see what he thinks...oops that is up $300. We met and he is thinking about $1500 and we will talk again.

Uli ran off up the hill toward Robinwood today. It cost him ten minutes in the bathroom. Yesterday a dog + human came by and the human kept calling Uli to go on the walk with them. Ulysses resisted the human.

Noah came over this afternoon and hung out talking and reading votong statistics while we tried out the hot sauce, first on crackers with goat cheese, then with smoked salmon and mozzerella and capers. Hendrix arrived and demonstrated the doctors examination techniques on me.

Thursday

Finally went for a ride in the car, tried Uli in the front seat, he hated it. He was a bit disappointed at home depot as well, walking right into all the cashiers spaces looking for treats to no avail. But he liked Millennium park.

They chant 'he's not my president'. Tough shit. He is. We get what we deserve.

The New Yorker ran a piece last week: THE DEMOCRATS’ FIGHT OVER FINANCE speculating in Clinton's upcoming cabinet appointments. They wrote of the Wall Street elite, those rarefied breed given bonuses by their companies for their stints in government. It's the same club who ran Obama's economic policy: the bailout, weak regulations, Trans pacific partnership, Obamacare(1), drone wars, an explosion of immigrants in privatized prisons(3) and other gifts to wall street, insurance and global corporations.

On the other side it is hard to figure what could unleash the dark underbelly of American culture, the racism, xenophobia and misogyny. Where did the new superhero come from if not from ourselves. Who allowed the unabated increase in wealth and income inequality(2) over the entire course of the Obama presidency, the misplace of trust and power that continued to flow to those elites who could pay Hillary a quarter of a million dollars to talk for an hour and pay her that much in 50 separate appearances. These are the same people who contributed to the Clinton Foundation otherwise known as Bill Clinton Inc, Mr mandatory minimum sentences, 3 strikes you're out, whose neoliberalism fucked over Haiti and countless others. So smug and cynical. Why do we think we are better than Trump supporters? More liberal. More educated. More worldly. Why are we surprised that they would say fuck you?

What's next? New younger democratic leaders? Fucking Chuck Shumer?

We don't know shit about other people. We fantasize that Latinos would love the democrats, assume that minorities believe in our bullshit, feel good about ourselves since we tip the people who clean out houses $20. We hold on to this lofty view of ourselves as Democrats in spite of all evidence to the contrary. We have been conned yet we still think we are superior.

We KNOW they have been conned, fooled by the Koch Brothers. How can they be so stupid and gullible?

So as the saying goes from Noah's silk screen poster that has been in our TV room since Occupy: 'two sides, one con'

So don't feel bad about my mom or Shaun and Cathy or half the people in the country. Democrats have little to be proud of. Our political identity is bullshit anyway, just one small creepy part of our character, a lower state of evolution. Who we are is who we love, what we care about and immerse ourselves in, what we do to make the world better. That's who they are too.

notes

(1)'average individual market medical costs increased substantially between 2013 and 2015, up an estimated 69%'. An EKG that six years ago cost $550 and was covered 100% by insurance today costs $2200. We are expected to be grateful than Blue Cross 'negotiated' with BIDMC to cut that by $1200 and be happy to pay only a $1000, none of it covered by insurance.

(2)http://inequality.org/income-inequality/ In The average income for 90% of Americans was $33,068. For the top 0.1% it was $6,087,113. Since Obama came into office the top 1% have seen their incomes go up 15% while 90% of Americans saw an increase of 0.06%

(3) can't find the citation right now but when Obama came into office there were 50,000 people a year held in immigration detention. Now there are over 300,00 a year held in private prisons.

Friday

It has been a week of beautiful fall days. Leaves cover the street and the driveway. They are light and fluffy a make that unique sound when you walk through them. But tonight it goes below freezing and it can't be long before everyone becomes serious about cleaning away the leaves as they deteriorate from their glory.

rotten to the core

5/31/16

I feel awful. In the pit of my stomach an emptiness, a hollowness. I keep wanting to fill it with just the right food or the right drink but nothing is satisfying.

I am weary. I lack motivation and joy. I am sad.

I could get angry... much too easily. I breathe out and I feel shaky.

At their worst my dad was a mean alcoholic and my mom was just mean. I have not escaped.

My dad is dying and he is not dying well. It is not the hallucinations or the confusion but the anger and the bitterness. He is aggressive and uncooperative in his own care. We are going to have to abandon him.

I fear being abandoned. I fear dying badly.

My mom too has a simmering core of venom. It comes out in obsessive, petty and uncharitable ways.

I have an edge to me that is harsh and nasty. The edge is just outside of of the pit of my stomach. My body and mind exists between the edge and the pit.

conspiracy is too easy

3/4/8

Hi Noah, I was overhearing you and Peri last night.

What conspiracy?

Bush fully supports Columbia's democracy. The US supports the Cameroonian democracy. Aristide has gone crazy, was overthrown by the people. OK, truth is stranger than fiction. And it is weird that all good American's supports the lies. I mean, the west has always been more Enlightened. We deserve our position in the world.

The sad fact is that you and I both support this system. Like Cameroonians, paying of the military at the checkpoints just to get by, we have bought in too. Look at the tag on your shirt, your shoes, your phone,anything really. If people who made all of our shit were getting paid enough to lead a decent life, we'd be without our stuff. That's why any attempt around the world to distribute the wealth from the tiny slice 5%-10% of rich people like you and me to the majority always get shut down by any means necessary. Nothing is too far fetched, this isn't a conspiracy its just the normal course of business since the Crusades, since Portugal sailed to Africa in 1450. So the children of the privileged yell conspiracy, are ignored, it gets bigger in their minds. Call it conspiracy if you want, but don't get all weird about it.

You are going to have to get more comfortable with the contradictions in your life. You never need to accept them. You should probably take responsibility, though. You got to go to Cameroon, when it comes down to it, as part of the conspiracy to keep the status quo in Cameroon. Segregate off the rich into their own schools. Hire teachers from America who get to live large. They can even invite their families who can hire people to carry their shit. We watch soccer from our seats, drinking beer while people try get get a view from the street. Privileged Americans, young and old, looking for niches by a beach where their dollars go far. If we overthrow the world order we'd have to stay home, if we could keep ourselves warm enough.

So you make decisions amidst the contradictions. You get off your high horse. You do the best you can each day, try to take full advantage of the education you are being offered. Temper your rants knowing your own complicity. Grow up a little. Your mom and I grew up in a time just as weird. I felt the system didn't respect or value tradespeople so I became a carpenter partly as a rejection of those values. I hated high school, I think it helps me be a good teacher. Your mom never really trusted medicine but does good work as a nurse. Most experiments don't work out. Don't beat yourself up about it. Work hard then relax knowing you are doing what you can. Take up meditation, play ball, play music, watch movies, dance. Ease the mental rants, lessen you paranoia, clean your self up.

Talk to me.

Love, Dad

cheap bastard who has a father

7/15/7

Hi Ari,

Last night I got home at around 11 and a beer would have hit the spot. (There was lots here when I left.). I got in the evil twin and thought it was cool that it was getting used then I saw the dead empty gas tank. I thought back on the stuff you wanted put in the shopping cart that first night in Laguna then how you disappeared when it was time to pay. Natalie is always throwing something down, you almost never do.

1. Pay Jim your share of the bar tab at the club for crissake ($30ea) and for the tickets ($25ea).
2. I need that phone replaced as well. I asked you twice to check wherever you left it with no response. You owe me a Dash for T-Mobile. Buy it somewhere (Ebay) and send it before you go.

This would be the minimum you could do to retain any thread of the responsible trusted relationship thing with me. Are you always like this or is it just with me?

For a long time I have divided the world in a simple way; those I can do business with and those who I can't. I guess the most essential element is trust but acting responsibly follows close behind. I ran a business on trust and goodwill in an untrusting environment. We did alot for each other, a kind of synergy that increased our power. You need a truck, some equipment, a tool, a loan, a favor, a break, some help, a few of my guys, whatever it was you got it. Not everybody made the cut, some people had a short term view; you'd get the truck back with an empty tank, have to chase down your stuff, didn't get paid back... They were the guys who had a weird view of the world. They would throw in high bids just to see if they could get the job, do shoddy work, screw over their guys on pay day. Turns out they were in the majority, good solid Americans, out for personal advancement. Who can blame them. Everyone's hustlin right? I sense a little of that in you.

I found I needed to buy into some code of conduct because then life doesn't seem so much of a hustle, chaotic, selfish and stupid. It helps me handle the hustlers, not get depressed as much about the human condition.

As for you and me, here's how I see it. I'd like you to be in that group that I can do business with but you don't have to be. If not I'll just more and more shy away from having our relationship cross those paths. It's not really in your long term interest to head in that direction. I have too much to offer in that regard. I suggest you buy your way back in quick.

Love, Dad